A Ugandan wedding

Thanks for all the emails about Fatuma. Yes, she is an inspiration. Now for some more Ugandan culture:

A few weeks ago our friend Jennifer invited us to her sister’s wedding reception (actually, one of her many half-sisters from her father’s co-wives). Eric was still here and we all went to experience the Ugandan event.

The setting was a lovely green field stretching down to Lake Victoria. The field was decorated like a wedding cake: white pillars with large orange bows and flowers everywhere, even a huge wedding cake rotating high on a platform. In the middle was a “castle for the bride,” as it was translated for us. This was a kind of raised room with a canopy, all covered in white and orange, with tiny white lights and candles illuminating the table for the wedding party.

The reception included music from some of the best bands and pop stars in Kampala, good music with lots of drums. The wedding party arrived in a car tied with huge ribbons. This is customary – we see them every weekend all over the city, cars with ribbons stretching over the roof and in front of the radiator, sometimes decorated with a huge bow, sometimes other things, like a big straw hat.

Everything was similar to an American wedding except for one thing. When it was time, the bride and groom cut the cake and then the groom sat in a chair and the bride knelt in front of him to feed him a piece of cake. Okay, so there is little women’s liberation here, but still! (Girls and women often kneel here. If I -- a white, older woman -- meet a young girl, sometimes she will fall to her knees with her hands folded, mumbling some welcome very quietly. Even our housegirl, Prossy, will kind of genuflect if you do something for her. It makes me very uncomfortable. Usually I tell them to stand up please!)

After speeches and lots of music, everyone got into a line to deliver the gifts. Eric very bravely took ours up (we didn’t know the bride or groom, and we were the only mzungus there – it was slightly embarrassing). And there was dinner – traditional Ugandan food eaten with the fingers, no silverware. We are getting pretty good at picking up rice with our fingers.

And then the dancing started. Again, Eric represented us ably. And that was it for our wedding experience – we went home much earlier than the native partiers. It was nice of Jennifer to include us in her family event; maybe someday the groom will kneel in front of the bride at a Ugandan wedding, but I won’t hold my breath!